Acceptance n denial

Feel like there are two sides of me that are so starkly different yet coexist. A practical side that has accepted it all, realizing that dragging it on unnecessarily would have only led to more pain. Another immature me that is in total denial, not ready to accept the truth, not ready to deal with it, not ready to let go. I keep shuttling between the two… between acceptance and denial… between hope n despair… between numbness n excruciating pain…